One day everything changed
Or did it
Were my insides just beginning to match my insides
A war on the inside
Waiting to self-destruct against my own will
Knowing and trusting something was not right I looked around for help
For answers
I was the smallest person looking up on a New York City street
The world was flying by and I couldn’t meet anyone’s gaze
Dodging people who maybe could have helped yet couldn’t hear me or see me
If anyone did see me
I was running
In too much fear
Not noticing
I fell face first into a puddle of water
I saw my reflection
I saw wreckage, damage, fear
A girl lost looking desperately for help.
As I stared I saw through this distorted image
I saw me, Ashlee. I found her. 27 years later
I walked equally amongst life for many years on that busy street
Suddenly I was starring at a similar puddle
Small again. No one could hear me or see me.
I have been here before I know this image this time I may not be able to change the war inside.


I can get up.
I will get up.
I did get up.
I found Ashlee.
I am Ashlee.

-Ashlee Whittemore, Houston, Texas